Dear New Mums, You Are Not Alone…

Dear New Mums, You Are Not Alone…

Its a scary time, having a baby, but its even scarier when your brand new baby is born with complications and you hear those heart breaking words from a doctor telling you your newborn has brain damage, or some other life limiting condition.  So this is my letter to you, if you’ve had that heartbreaking news recently.

Let me start by saying this… you’re not alone.

It might seem right now that you are, that no one other than you can possibly understand what this feels like, but we do and we are here for you and with you.

We know how numb you feel and how your life just suddenly changed in a heartbeat. How your hopes and dreams for the future seem to have been stolen from you and your beautiful baby. We get it.

You’re not alone.

You may already have left the hospital and be at home juggling medicines and appointments with doctors and therapists.  Professionals who are there to make things better but seem to be breaking your heart with everything they tell you about the future.  Delivering every little bit of information wrapped neatly with a little bow full of negativity.  We get it.

You’re not alone.

You might be sitting in your perfect nursery reading this, looking at the walls you painted whilst imagining the perfect life you’d have with your baby.  Remembering the toys you picked out whilst gently holding your bump.  And feeling your heart break all over again. We get it.

You’re not alone.

You may be looking at your friends babies and wonder whether the pang of jealousy you feel makes you the worst friend in the world.. it doesn’t.  You may feel like they are on a different journey to you now and in a way they are but its no better or worse than yours, it’s just different. We get it.

You’re not alone.

Your ‘perfect’ life with your ‘perfect’ baby isn’t over. Its just beginning and it’s going to be amazing.

Yes it may be slightly different to the life you’d imagined but it’s still going to be incredible.

You’re going to have different hopes and dreams for your baby now. Not better or worse, just different.

You’re going to celebrate every tiny thing they do, the smallest thing will be an amazing achievement and will put the biggest smile on your face.

You’ll learn that you are the ‘professional’ in your babies life, and no matter how many times a therapist knocks your hopes and dreams, you will carry on because you will know what your child is capable of.

You’re going to meet some incredible friends who would never have been part of your life if it wasn’t for your amazing baby and you’ll wonder how you could ever have not known them.

You’re going to learn that despite statistics and future diagnoses being rattled off as if there’s nothing positive to look forward to, nothing could be further from the truth.

You’ll realise that there’s nothing extraordinary about being ordinary and your son or daughter is a miracle who will bring you more joy than you could ever think possible.

Life today may not be what you were expecting it to be but it is going to be incredible.  We get it.

You’re not alone.

It’s 7 years since I was in your position but I can tell you from my heart that you are embarking on an incredible journey and no matter how you feel right now you ARE strong enough to do this.

You got this.

And when you feel like you haven’t just remember…

You’re not alone.

I always love to read your comments but today, please leave one below so other new mums know they aren’t alone.

*This post was originally published on 20th June 2016, a year later I thought it was a good one to republish*

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